Nan has an elderly gentleman admirer called Donnie, an unattractive version of dear Paul Daniels - as she got older her standards definitely slipped. I'm ashamed to admit they once came up to visit me at University and I pretended I wasn't in as they hammered at the door - I loved Nan, but didn't want anyone to see me with him. They spent most of their time arguing - well, Nan argued and Donnie apologised. He brought her frequent presents - she said tartly that this was because he hoped to take their relationship to the next level (but let's not go there - it is not a good thought).
Horrified Nan pushed Donnie off the sofa and as he got up she hit him around the head with a rolled-up magazine. Exit Donnie - no apologies would suffice - he had had his chips. For a good while after Nan entertained her girl friends (think Golden Girls merged with the witches in Macbeth) with lurid descriptions of the magazines and how disgusted she was. I did wonder about her detailed recall of the contents of said publications when we were told she had immediately thrown them in the dustbin.