Thursday, 5 April 2012

Me and the village crime wave

When I was nine I went back to live with my mum and dad in the countryside.  School was in a village about three miles away and we went there by coach.  A boy in the year above me constantly picked on me saying I talked funny, had nits (I didn't - I can assure you) and needed a good thumping. Robin was a tough little ruffian with brown hair and rosy cheeks and proceeded  to  make my life miserable.

But then one day things changed.  On the way to school one morning he announced to the coach that I was now his girlfriend (this relationship had no long term future - I wasn't his cousin so probably wouldn't have been accepted by his family).  My feelings didn't seem to matter, but to be honest this was preferable to physcial violence.  Robin then decided only he could say who say next to me on the coach home - he, of course, didn't because he sat in the back seat with all the naughty boys.  He also objected to me reading as he could hardly read or write.

During the summer holidays we returned from our family holiday and there was a lumpy envelope in the hallway.  Addressed to me in ill-formed writing it contained two rings and a necklace - I knew it was from my swain and took it as my due.  Sometime after he asked for the return of my jewels - which were currently adorning Barbie.  His mum had noticed her denuded jewellery box, accused his older brother of stealing them to buy cider and was threatening to call the police.

I was relieved when he left to go to secondary school and I could sit where I liked on the coach.

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